How to get semi-smashed on a half-glass of wine....

Get a band girls and boys, get a band!!

MOTH (Man of the House) and I headed up to Perth this morning to attend an appointment he had booked. I always love the days I have him completely to myself and we were both in a great mood.

To stretch the day out I suggested why, since we were already here in the Big City, don't we stay and have some lunch. A sandwich and coffee was all I was after. Instead we ended up changing those plans and headed to Freo (Fremantle to the uninitiated - such a beautiful place to be.) There we went down to the Boardwalk - the same area I met my newly banded friends for lunch a few weeks ago - but to a different restaurant. Joe's Fish Shack is my kind of place. It sits on the water overlooking boats and ships of every shape, size and colour, and we sit inside under a rustic roof surrounded by muted colour, massive top to floor glass windows and lots of polished floor boards.

Anyway, what to order as a still relatively new bandit who is still testing the whole fill theory?MOTH and I mulled it over for a bit and decided to share. We ordered a tasting plate (large triangles of lightly toasted Turkish bread, kalamata olives, 1cm x 1cm blocks of feta, chirozio sausage and a warm olive oil with balsamic vinegar.) So darn yum. MOTH had a cream seafood chowder (the serves here are beyond massive by the way) and we got stuck in. Oh yeah, and I had a glass of red (small) while he had a light Naked Blonde Beer. Great name for a beer, we had a laugh over it, 'specially THIS blonde!

I went into that restaurant starving!! I mean 'eat the arse-end out of a dead donkey' starving. But after three pieces of the bread and assorted pieces of the other stuff.. well, I was stuffed. And almost bloody drunk lol. After one lousy drink. I mean, I was never one who could hold her drink much anyway - I think two pot screamer comes to mind - but seriously, one teeny glass?

I mentioned I had been holding fast on that one cup rule per meal and I do manage to mostly stick with it. Eating out is another story. Though hungry I ate slowly, chewed well, and then that familiar lump in my breastbone appeared. I broke my own rule and had a swig of wine (I also adhere to the not eating and drinking lol or at least when I'm compos enough to) and that seemed to fix the problem. Only thing is, when I had my next bite, suddenly the food seemed dangerously close to bubbling back up. I had to hold a serviette to my mouth.

It's the weirdest feeling ever. It's like you NEED to burp but you know if you do, that it wont be your average belly buster, it will most likely be food. With lots of spit. It's not a great look surrounded by other diners. So a lot of deep breathing and concentrating on keeping things down finally did the trick. Not that MOTH was helping as he gestured for me to have a little more because it hadn't seemed like I had eaten a whole lot. I just gestured back... wait! wait! I'm kinda busy here. I saw recognition dawn. He gently rubbed my back (didn't help - was even more distracting) and made me have to breathe even deeper.

Then like the plonker I am.. with the sun so warm, full as a goog and very tipsy I nodded off leaving MOTH with his own thoughts as he drove us home. Got in the door and flaked out for another hour on the couch leaving him to sort getting the kids from school. Hows my form!! lol

And the moral of the story is: Cara cannot drink during the daytime ... not even a little. Oh Joy!! MOTH thinks it's all pretty funny. His wife has suddenly turned into a very cheap date!!

Cara xxx