Have you ever looked at a gravestone? On it you will find the date a person was born - and the date that person died. In between is a dash. This small symbol signifies a persons whole existence. When it comes time for my dash to be chipped in, I want to know I lived a full and wondrous life.

Jan 4, 2010

I've lost my mojo....


Who knew my new word for 2010 would have to be relied on so soon! I am having to use all my 'focus' getting through each day due to a serious lack of true restriction. What is left of it is due mostly to me eating lightly. Bad thing is the hunger is back and with a vengeance. I'm mostly relying on my water intake at the moment. I am drinking gallons of the stuff and it seems to help  if I don't mind the sloshing sounds that accompany me everywhere I go - and frequent visits to the loo. 

I know I still have a bit of restriction because when I'm eating I still get that heavy feeling in my chest if I go too fast or not chew enough. I got stuck with a grape a couple of nights ago. A grape people!!! It was a big sucker and though I chewed it, a big piece slipped down and then uh oh.. that familiar choked up feeling hit me half way down my throat and into my chest. I tried to get some water down to flush it though, but it made it worse. Compounding it was the fact it was right on bedtime.. I went to lay down and the water fought it's way back up. I had some interesting noises happening. Gurgles and burps and all weird and wonderful sounds were creating an orchestra all of its own (and I was getting a little freaked out.) It finally came back up after about the third heave over the sink with a lot of the drunk water slipping back up. Fun times.. not! 



I tried ringing the Doc's office this morning to BEG for an earlier appointment but no joy. All I got was the fax machine. I do know though that he's not here until Wednesday on but it didn't hurt to try. I still have 10 days before my next appointment and it's going to be a long week plus.

I want to say a huge hello to all my new followers and of course to all my young (won't say old lol) ones. I have surpassed the 100+ mark and it's very exciting. 100 plus fellow bloggers want to read what I have to say. Ooooooh... and I have another marker. I've posted over 200 posts. Amazing. 

Hope the start to the New Year is treating you all well. I have a busy busy day today and I must get moving. Too easy to sit here and do nothing. But alas.........

See you all again soon
Cara xx

18 comments:

  1. Focus grasshopper Focus!! You CAN do it and who cares if you sloosh or hit the loo often? Whatever it takes to help you through the hunger! I like your word btw!! ;-)

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  2. The sloshing sounds from all the water is kinda crazy isn't it? But I am glad that it does help. I would hate to see where I would be if it didn't! I figure by the end of the day today I will have 15 cups in. I was very bad today and didn't eat until afternoon and I am paying for it now. I just keep refilling the water bottle and made sure I didn't get anything too tempting when I went shopping today. However, I will probably be up all night using the bathroom LOL!!

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  3. 100+ followers! Congrats! Seriously, you are a shining star in the WLS blogosphere! Thanks for all you do. Focus is a great word o' the year!

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  4. Here's hoping you get your fill this week instead of next!! I only wish my next fill was this week instead of another 3 wks!!! As my word says, give me "strength" to make it to the next fill. LOL

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  5. Congrats on all your followers! Glad to hear you had a great xmas & new year. Bummer that you are struggling so much though. I had the WORST xmas/new year last year where I couldn't keep anything down and had to wait for the surgeon to get back from leave for an unfill. Not fun!

    Anyhoo, here's to another fab year weightwise (and otherwise!)

    Em :)

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  6. Awesome on the followers! You are such a great support! A true Gem

    Sorry you are feeling the hunger. I hope you can get in sooner with the doc

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  7. I have heard that grapes are notorious for getting stuck - it is the skin covering them that can totally end up covering the opening into the main stomach (or second stomach as my hubby likes to call it hehehe)

    I often seem to pb liquids (trying to drink to early) but at least they come up fairly painlessly hehehe

    I just noticed that I am not on your stalking list sob sob ;-)

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  8. The grape had me laughing..who would have thought that vomit stories could keep us so entertained...The band is both the joy and bane of our existence eh? Have you tried hot drinks? Tea and coffee seem to keep me fake full for longer than cold drinks do.

    I hope you get a fill soon! Mine is Tuesday..I hope it works to bust this damned hump I'm living on!!

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  9. Hello Gorgeous Cara

    I have been MIA or AWOL for a bit sorry I haven't popped in for ages!! I have been reading though, I love love reading your blog!!

    I am having trouble with restriction too - have an app on 20th of this month but am going to ring tomorrow and beg for an earlier one!!

    Take Care
    Bec

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  10. Cara, how much fill do you currently have? I will be getting my 4th of fill in two weeks, right now I am @ 6.2cc in a 10cc band but really feel nothing. I am curious how many cc it took before you really started seeing some losses?

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  11. Cara, I found that white carbs tended to make me feel hungry sooner so I stuck with meat/cheese proteins to help through periods like this. Congrats on the 100+ followers and 200th post. Take care.

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  12. Hey Cara, I know exactly what you are saying... I tried to get an earlier appt for my next fill as the restriction is waining for me as well. Wouldn't it be great it they had a DIY kit for us to fix ourselves!!! Hang in there

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  13. Just wanted to send you the poem which goes with your blog. It is sooooo appropriate.

    The Dash Poem by Linda Ellis
    I read of a man who stood to speak
    At the funeral of a friend
    He referred to the dates on her tombstone
    From the beginning to the end
    -
    He noted that first came the date of her birth
    And spoke the following date with tears,
    But he said what mattered most of all
    Was the dash between those years
    -
    For that dash represents all the time
    That she spent alive on earth.
    And now only those who loved her
    Know what that little line is worth.
    -
    For it matters not how much we own;
    The cars, the house, the cash,
    What matters is how we live and love
    And how we spend our dash.
    -
    So think about this long and hard.
    Are there things you’d like to change?
    For you never know how much time is left,
    That can still be rearranged.

    If we could just slow down enough
    To consider what’s true and real
    And always try to understand
    The way other people feel.

    And be less quick to anger,
    And show appreciation more
    And love the people in our lives
    Like we’ve never loved before.
    -
    If we treat each other with respect,
    And more often wear a smile
    Remembering that this special dash
    Might only last a little while.
    -
    So, when your eulogy is being read
    With your life’s actions to rehash
    Would you be proud of the things they say
    About how you spent your dash?
    -
    Sandra

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  14. Happy New Year Cara! Good luck on FOCUSING until your fill. You'll make it...

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  15. I have gotten stuck on grapes several times. I think it is the skin or something! Once I had eaten quite a bit of grapes and got stuck on one at the end. They all came up and I can tell you for sure it was all the skin!

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  16. Congrats X3 If I had fluid that would keep me feeling full and SATISFIED I would slush all day and night. I do know when I exercise I'm not as hungry. You would think I would be exercising all the time. I'm trying to with my Wii. Good luck and keep up the good work.

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  17. Hey Cara, thanks for stopping by my blog.. I tried to do the "drink lots of water" approach today.. well, you know what goes in needs to come out.. I was running to the bathroom all day!! I only wish that it worked like a fat flush.. I would hook my self up to a hose. be well

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  18. Hey sweets - here's hoping you get your fill a little early. Won't it be nice when we get to the place where we can go for months without one? Someday..
    If not, you'll make it - just stay focused.
    Thanks for the not earlier. I was excited to win the contest, although even if I hadn't I'm excited to lose 18 pounds in 10 weeks.

    xxxxLinda

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Best year of my life - 42.3 kilos gone forever